Passion: My First Crush

I remember my first big crush. I thought I was so in love with him, but he hardly ever even gave me a second look. He had graduated from high school and I was just beginning high school. I met him through mutual friends. He worked at a major shoe store chain and I would drag my friends with me to go see him at his store. (I am pretty sure now that I came across as a young annoying high school girl chasing him, which was true).

My school notebooks were filled with his name; John. I wrote John all over the front of my school binders. I wanted so much for him to pay attention to me and fall madly in love with me. John, John, John. I dreamed about John. I become completely consumed with John.

I hoped, I wished, I prayed, I made my presence known. I hung out at the store where he worked as much as possible.

Finally! He asked me out for a date. I was on cloud nine. It was my dream come true! I could hardly wait! I climbed into his truck not knowing where we were going for our “date.” To my dismay, he took me to high school kegger (kegs of beer) at “the river”. This “keg party” was full of kids all of whom were inebriated. I don't drink, so I was fully sober. There were only two dirt roads going into the camp from the highway.

Suddenly, with no warning, four police cars came roaring into the kegger camp with their siren and lights exploding; two police cars coming in from each of the two roads. All the kids were blocked in and unable to drive away (which was a good thing). Kids were running in all directions trying to get away. I found a large bush and climbed into the middle of it and stayed perfectly still and quiet. I heard kids screaming. I heard kids being put into the police cars. I heard a lot of confusion happening.

Finally, the area became very quiet. The police were long gone with the ones that had been caught. They were on their way to the police station. There, the police would call their parents to come get them. Only a few were left behind, and I was one of those few. I crawled out of my hiding place and finally found John.

Sadly, this was my “dream” date with my “dream boy” John.

He never asked me out again.

But I was okay with that.

After all, John was fickle.

Do you remember your first crush? Or your first love? If so, please share!



18 thoughts on “Passion: My First Crush

  1. That’s a great story! John was a teenage boy who by definition is an idiot. (I’ve had two … ) And he probably didn’t ask you out again because he was mortified. You on the other hand were free to find someone who would appreciate you. 😉
    I’m afraid it’s been many years since my first crush, so I’ll have to dig into my memory for that one… I’ll get back to you. Great post!

      • We’ve all been there I am not sure I’ve totally cleared the stupid part lol When I was 12 I was over-weight, had a bad perm (why my mom thought I needed a perm when I already had curly hair is a mystery), had an especially distorted sense of fashion and was pretty miserable not a lot of friends either. I had a crush on the popular boy (he was also a bad boy) now I assumed he’d never go for me and I was so young that I wasn’t really ready to be in a relationship it was enough just watching him act up in class ya know? My friend thought I should call him and called him for me despite protest, he was pretty rude and hung up. Then weirdly he called back and talked to us for several hours. Then later after she’d left he called my house again. He started to call everyday. He called any time I mean the middle of the night even and my mom being rather strange always gave me the phone. I’d be like mom it is 2 in the morning but she didn’t care. We talked about everything and laughed a lot. I can’t say we have much in common really but he was a good listener. Even when I was being super lame he seemed fascinated. He researched everything I liked. He also had everyone in school be nice to me, no more bullying. People who never talked to me started talking to me. It wasn’t all good though he would say mean things that would hurt my feelings about how I was lucky to have him because no one else would want me. Manipulative stuff you know? He tried to get me to do stuff I didn’t want steal money or do something embarrassing and if I didn’t, which was usually the case, because I am stubborn he would get mad sulk and not talk to me for a few days. He started calling me the second I got home from school. He wouldn’t let me get off the phone. He called my friend’s houses and everywhere if he couldn’t find me. He even called me when I went out of town and harassed my mom nonstop about when I’d return. He had people watch me. He threatened all my male friends and even got one of them kicked out of school and thrown into military camp. It was when he went after my friends I said no more.He stopped going to school and told me he would have everyone bully me since he’d convinced everyone to talk to me originally I didn’t know if the whole school was going to turn on me. They didn’t because I had been nice to them they decided not to be mean to me. He stabbed himself in the stomach luckily he didn’t die and got some help. I never saw him after he left school but my mom had to continuously change our number. I told my mom when I ended it what happened and that I didn’t want to speak to him so she kept him away. She had my step dad threaten him and that was the end of it. Never in a million years would I have thought the popular good-looking guy would stalk me the ugly little weirdo just did not see that coming. Life is really strange sometimes.

        • Very interesting! But I have to disagree. You are much to beautiful to have been a fat ugly weirdo when you were young. Obviously, he had a lot of problems and it is good that he was not able to hurt you further after you broke it off with him. Very sad he had to stab himself in the stomach in order to receive the help he needed. Actually, the way I see it, you did a lot more for him than he did for you. Thank you for sharing your story with me. 😀


          • Thank you so much PJ That was a pretty awkward phase for me in middle school I think I have destroyed much of the picture evidence haha. He had a bad home life as he was only 12 a child I certainly harbor no animosity and I am very glad he did not die. I made the right choice ending it though

          • Yes you did make the right choice! I know at the age 12 – 15 I was awkward too. I felt ugly and unlovable. I definitely had low self esteem. I too am glad the boy didn’t die. But, it still is sad that he was so emotionally ill.


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