Once Upon a Time is a little diner on the corner of 5th and Broadway, right across from my dismal room at the boarding house. Sometimes I go there and have coffee, or something to eat, just to be around people and the busyness of their lives. When I am not at the diner, I am standing at my window wishing I was. Once upon a time I hitchhiked the famous Route 66. Once upon a time it brought me here. Once upon a time I had someone in my life. Once Upon a Time is my kind of place.
copyright: Jean L. Hays
Friday Fictioneers is hosted by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields Addicted to Purple. Each Friday she selects a photograph that we use to create a story of 100 words or less. If you are interested in joining the challenge please click on this url for more information:
http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2015/01/07/2-january-2015/
Wow! I like your once upon a time. It fits in so many ways.
Cool! I was hoping it did. The host of the challenge said there are many ways we could go with it and my imagination just took off! Haha! Thank you Betty!
You’re welcome!
Dear Joy,
The repetition of “Once upon a time” works so well in this story. A rather wisful and lonely story, but a good read nonetheless.
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you Rochelle. I apologize. I forgot to put your credits in my story when I published it. Then I remembered and went back and updated it with your credits in it.
No worries. The only time I request recognition is if someone uses my artwork on their blog. 😉
Which reminds me, I absolutely your artwork that I have seen. I am so glad you include one in each of your Friday Fictioneers post.
Thanks, Joy. There won’t be an illustration all the time but I’m getting back in touch with that side of myself so I can promise more when the need arises. 😉
That’s wonderful!
Once upon a time, I read this and I loved it. Once upon a time, I just had to read it again 😉
Thanks Ameena! I am happy you liked it. I feel so inadequate next to those other fabulous Friday Fictioneer writers! I mean REALLY GOOD writers! Hugs!!
Aw PJ, you are modest 🙂 . Personally, I would read your story any day!
Aww thank Ameena, you are so sweet!! (and very kind!) LOL! Hugs!! xo
Using “Once Upon a Time” throughout links it all together and would be a good name for a coffee shop or diner.
janet
Thank you! It really would be a good name for a diner or restaurant. Or a toy store. 🙂 Hugs!
It is so hard to write a story in just 100 words, but this is brilliant! It is almost like poetry what with the repetition.
Thank you! I appreciate your nice comment. It is difficult to write a 100 words (or less) story but oh so much fun! 🙂
once upon a time the sun will rise again, i suppose. cheers!
LOL! Yes, it will. Trouble is, I only had 100 words I could use on the story. 😀
darn! 🙂
haha! It’s fun. Have you tried it?
So sad and beautiful. I want to find this person and that coffee shop. Great work!
Chris
Thank you Chris! I appreciate it! 🙂
I enjoyed the rhythm of this.
Thank you Dawn! I appreciate your opinion. 🙂 xo
Nice, Sis Pj! BTW, I know the route 66 from “CAR” lol! Do you live there?
Car? I don’t know where that is? Are you speaking about an automobile?
CAR , it’s a movie telling about Racing. Special movie for children. 😅 You wrote everything nicely, Sis PJ!
Thank you very much! With you being a teacher I feel like that is quite a compliment. 🙂
Always welcome, Sis PJ! 😊💗
((Hugs!!)) Love & Peace 🙂
I loved these words so much!
Thank you Sis PJ 😍
The picture in the story was a Photo Prompt. All those in the Friday Fictioneers get the very same photo and we are to write a story from looking at this photo. It’s a lot of fun!
Such a sad and lonely story – but cleverly told. Lovely language.
Thank you Margaret. Oh the places we could go if we just had a “few more words” (more than 100) for our stories. LOL! Love and Peace
I like the ambiguity of the final sentence – referring to the diner and maybe also to the life left behind. Quite a sad story, well told!
Thank you very much! If I had more than 100 words to use, I would have made it have a happy ending. 🙂
Dear PJ,
I like the way you used the repetition of Once Upon a Time in the conclusion of your story. It added to the tale and to the voice of the narrator.
Aloha,
Doug
Thank you Doug. I appreciate your opinion. 🙂 Thanks!
Clever and moving and well written. Sad that things went sour for the narrator.
Hopefully, he meets someone in the diner. 🙂 Thanks!
I really liked the repetition of “once upon a time.” It pulls the reader along, and shows us the irony, without spelling it out. The melancholy longing comes through, in those 4 words, played over and over.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate your opinion and your comment. I can only improve if people comment. Thanks!! xo
The repetition worked well; and the desolation of the narrator’s circumstances came through clearly. Well done.
Thank you Sandra. I really appreciate you reading and commenting. In fact, I am honored. I can only improve with great writers like yourself, giving me feedback. ((Hugs!)) BTW, your story was wonderful!!
I liked the way you linked with Once upon a time both as a name and as a fairy tale telling of a better, brighter life than the dismal, lonely one now lived.
Thank you Irene! I appreciate your opinion greatly. When I was writing it I wasn’t sure where to go with it so I just allowed it to go “come what may.” 😀 Thank you for your comment!
Well it worked and well. 🙂
Thank you so much. 🙂
This is delightfully wistful. Well done.
Thank you very much! 🙂
Loved the repetition of “once upon”… so thought provoking and …. sad.
Thank you Roger! I was hoping it would sound okay and be “repetitious”. Thanks again!
Good story about a lonely person who has great memories and a special place to keep them going. Well told and great pacing. 🙂 — Suzanne
Thank you so much Suzanne!! (Hugs) xo
🙂